My life is hard. Here's my daily routine:
1:00 AM - Tell Mom what time it is with a polite "meow"
2:00 AM - Remind her I need to be pet, which she does half-heartedly. Dad ignores me.
2:30 AM - Tell Mom it's time to sleep on the couch, because the bed is getting uncomfortable. I like to sleep on her on
the bed, but then switch to the couch. That way I'm close to the food bowl so I can snack a little in-between.
3:00 AM - Meow my most delightful meow to let Mom know she needs to get up for work, but she grumpily tells me
"It's not time yet."
3:30 AM - Sometimes Mom's alarm goes off and she goes down in the basement to exercise. I get a little attention, but
I have to wait until 4:00 AM to get Mom's full doting time. She's more awake and better at it by then.
4:30 AM - I wait for Mom in the bathroom to shower, dress, dry her hair and do whatever it is she does with her face.
5:00 AM - Daddy's alarm goes off, but I ignore it, because Mommy is in the kitchen making food. I may want some or I
may just want to get pet some more. She can't ignore me if I get in-between her legs.
5:45 AM - My parents are leaving me home alone to party, sleep, play or whatever I want to do all day, but it is hard to
keep watch over the house. I can't prove it since I'm alone all day, but I do watch the windows for intruders.
I keep bad people from breaking in, because I'm pretty tough.
4:00 PM to BEDTIME - I let Dad and Mom try to entertain me, but they sometimes fail at it. The laser light works pretty good, but I lose my attention with it quickly.
On the weekends it is a little easier, but I mostly help my mom write her stupid books. I still try to wake her up multiple times, but she really gets grumpy with me. I'm only trying to give her a chance to write more. My life is hard.
The solar eclipse is going to put a damper on my daily routine. I don’t follow the news, but I do love soaking in the warmth of the sun. I was upset when I heard that the moon was going to cover the sun for about 2 to 3 hours. I already have to put up with a lot of cloudy days in the winter, which means my favorite room for sun bathing doesn’t get any of the warm rays. It’s still summer and I want my sun!
I guess this disturbing eclipse doesn’t happen very often. My mom told me a total eclipse of the sun came to the continental United States in 1979, but the one that actually crossed over North America hasn’t happened since 1918. She’s old enough to remember the one in 1979, but told me not to even think about asking if she was alive for the one in 1918. She said, “I’m not that old.” Since I can just jump into my time travel pod to see this eclipse any time, it really isn’t a big deal, but why would I want to do that? As I said before, I like the sun!
I’m glad I don’t live in that 70 mile path between Oregon and South Carolina, because the moon will cover all of the sun for a short time. I bet cats living there will be angrier than me. In Colorado, a bit of the sun will show through, which means people who are dummies will think they can look at the sun, because it won’t be bright like it normally is. I know better than that! My mom gave me these special eclipse viewing glasses (regular sun glasses aren't good enough), but she said she will probably just close all the curtains in the house so I won’t be tempted to look at it while she’s at work. I’m not ignorant. I can open the curtains, but I will use the glasses. I don’t want to hurt my eyes. Truthfully, I'll probably sleep through the whole thing.
Here’s more info if you’re curious: https://eclipse.aas.org/eclipse-america
Photo of me taken when I visited the lake in my time travel vessel. I didn't go back in time, but it gets me to places faster.
I'm not used to being without my brother on these time travel adventures. Today I will just introduce my newly named blog: Hobbes Happenings. I hope to see some cool stuff, in the future but for now I'm just going to stay home and help Mommy feel better. She seems really sad, but I'm doing my best to perk her up. I wake her up with my adorable face. I purr for her. I let her rub my head and ears. I even let her kiss me, YUCK! I give her the privilege of feeding me and playing with me also. I don't know what more I can do for her. I do spend a lot of time on her lap, so she should be the happiest person alive.
Anyway, have a super weekend!
It breaks my heart to say that Tigger is no longer with us. He wrote one last blog. He will never be forgotten, because he brought so much joy into our lives. RIP Tigger.
My time travel days are over. I’m old and not feeling my normal chipper self. Can you believe it that food doesn’t even sound good to me? Food was my obsession! My brother still romps and plays and we’re actually the same age. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but my parents took me to this place where these strangers poked, pricked, and scared me. Once I got home, I was relieved to be in my safe and comfortable happy place.
If I could take my time travel capsule somewhere, it would be back to the times when I was less than a year old. That was when I felt the world was my oyster. I loved everyone and everything. Nothing scared me. I could even go back a couple of years ago when I ate to my heart’s content. My parents continue to dote and love on me even though I’m less perky. I’m worried about Mommy though, because her eyes keep leaking water, and she looks so sad. She talks to me a lot, and I wish I understood what she was saying. I want to tell her not to be gloomy, but I don’t know how to do that.
This will be my last blog, but perhaps my brother Hobbes will write one in the future without me. Thanks for taking the time to read about our adventures. It was a blast.
T-T-F (Ta-Ta Forever)
Since we can travel anywhere at any time and still beat Mom home from work for dinner, we decided to see what the world does for Christmas in our time travel vessel.
In France, fatty Santy is called Père Noël (Father Christmas). He’s a nice enough guy but we really enjoyed the treats he puts in shoes on Christmas day. We don’t wear shoes (duh) so we had to steal some from the kids. We also sneaked into the big feast families shared on December 25th. It was enough food to keep us content until we returned home.
In Italy, they have a Feast of the Seven Fishes on Christmas Eve. Guess what we did there? Eat of course! We avoided the cake called Panettone, because it had dried fruit in it. No reason to be healthy for the holidays, right? This old lady Befana is supposed to be the Italian children’s Santa, but she didn’t put any food in the kid’s stockings so that was a disappointment.
In Greece, on Christmas Eve, children, especially boys, go out singing kalanda (carols) in the streets. If the adults like what they hear, they may give money, and things to eat like nuts, sweets, and dried figs. We decided it wasn’t worth the effort and didn’t go caroling. We did join in the main Christmas meal which is lamb or pork. They also had this baklava stuff for dessert, but we didn’t like the smell so we wouldn’t eat it. They do some other stuff with the twelve days of Christmas, but we only care about the food part of their tradition.
In Mexico they celebrate Christmas from December 12th to January 6th so we had to figure out the days they had special treats. Thank you Google! http://www.whychristmas.com/cultures Each night children walk in a parade called a Posada. Many houses turn them away like the inn keeper did for Mary and Joseph. Eventually one house lets them in where they have food and games for the kids. Some houses even have piñatas which have candy in them so the children bat those around which looks like us trying to catch a fly in the house (great fun). Eventually they hit the piñata hard enough to break it so all the candy goes everywhere.
We’re home now. We think ultimately that’s the best place to be. Our parents love us, and even though we criticize their abilities to spoil us properly, they do all right. We hope no matter how you celebrate your holidays that you have fun and eat lots. That’s what we plan to do! Also, rub up against those you love and let them know you care, because people need to know they’re loved and you can sucker them out of some food doing that too.
Since it is National Cat Day, we should be honored with extra food and attention. Don't focus on the things we do that you don't approve of or cringe at. Instead, look at all the joy we bring.
After all who greets you when you come home from work? We do! Who lies on your lap while you type away on your computer? We do! Who makes you laugh when our crazy time hits, even at the expense of our own dignity? We do! Who purrs non-stop for hours while we're on your lap or next to your chair? We do! Who waits for you to get out of the shower? We do! Who rubs up against you, and weaves in and out of your legs in the kitchen? We do! Who wakes you up gently with a paw, which is way better than an obnoxious alarm clock? We do!
We're the ones who keep your stress level down and lower your blood pressure. Our purrs alone are like a soothing balm. Laughter is the best medicine, and we make you laugh. Therefore, we are keeping you healthy! We are what make life a little more pleasant despite all the people who do the opposite.
National Cat Day is an insult, because every day should be Cat Day. We ask all cats to unite and demand fair treatment! Ask not what your cat will do for you, but what you will do for your cat! Extra treats would be nice, and maybe some more of that soft food in a can that you reserve for bed time. Love us and we will love you.
Tigger and Hobbes
We just pasted pages from our scrapbook to share this story with you. In the end, we love the life we have. We wouldn't have wanted the hard work it takes to participate in the Olympics, and we like to have free time to explore the world in our time travel vessel.
After our parents returned from their European tour, we decided to jump in our time travel vessel and see what the big deal was. So we put on these disguises and sneaked into Buckingham Palace. We had no trouble getting past all the crowds or the Royal Guard, but the queen's little dogs started barking at us as soon as they saw us. We were forced to escape those squatty bodies who are fatter than us!
Now we know why Mom wrote about this place in her book. There's lots of good food, friendly cats, and everyone runs on cat time (they call it Hawaiian time). There's no rushin' or stressin'.
Hobbes & Tigger
We ventured to New York City to check out that lighthouse that looks like a lady. Since there was nothing to eat near that lady statue, we sniffed out this huge M&M place. We got sick eating stuff in that store and had to come home. Evidently candy isn't good for us. If you decide to go to New York, make sure you like to see lots of people and action. We prefer the calm silence of our home.
Hobbes & Tigger
We decided to visit another place our mom wrote about in her book. To avoid the Civil War, we arrived in Savannah, Georgia in 1860. We were told many soldiers in the war had pet dogs, cats, squirrels, raccoons, and other wild life, but we didn’t want to be a soldier’s pet since we have the run of our current house. Life was difficult for everyone back then, even people. We have a temperature controlled house and as much food as we need. Why would we want to live in an era that doesn't have the same comforts? We're smart cats, we know when we have a good thing. Of course we like to pretend we are suffering from starvation and lack of proper attention. It makes our mom feel guilty and she ends up spoiling us. In fact, we pretended to be orphans displaying our most pathetic faces to some nice lady at the plantation. She gave us some fried chicken, and pet us for a long time. It got too hot for us so we had to come back home to the air conditioning.
Tigger & Hobbes
I jumped in my kitty time travel ship to visit the places my mom wrote about in Travelers. My brother, Tigger, came along. He couldn't pose for this photo, because he was too busy eating some Greek foods like fish, cheese, and maybe some chicken. He had to keep his large belly full. We met a lot of cats in Greece. People like to have felines around to keep away mice, snakes and scorpions, so we didn't really feel out of place. I learned that the Greek word for cat is gata. I also found out that the 1st Olympics were here. We didn't want to stick around too long, because we didn't want to miss meal time at home. It doesn't matter how often we eat, we always want more.
Hobbes & Tigger (not pictured)
Tigger & Hobbes, have decided to time travel across the world to visit the places their mom, Carla, writes about in her books. They may also visit new locations she doesn't have in her novels. In the near future, they will be recording their adventure logs here. Please come back to follow their adventures!